Books That Creeped Me Out When I Was Young

I was a weird child (which you probably already know if you've read this post or this post), and today we're going to look at yet another weird part of my childhood behaviour...

So I've been working in a library recently and reorganizing the picture book shelves made me think of the books I read as a kid, in particular the books and fictional things that kind of creeped me out. If you didn't need yet another reason to think I'm weird, then just look at some of the things I was creeped out by:

 

1. The 19th story of Wayside school,  the one that doesn't exist

2. Heffalumps

 

3. Nova's Ark by David Kirk - For some reason, I thought the pictures in this book were fascinating but also kind of scary.

 

4. Time Flies by Eric Rohmann - In my opinion, that cover is still scary.

5. The wicked thought in The Red Racer by Audrey Wood - that big green monster struck fear in my young heart, I tell you.

 

 

I know these things aren't really that scary, but they genuinely did scare me when I was younger.  These fictional things and books actually made my insides twist and my heart speed up. (This is also why I don't read horrors or thrillers or anything, haha). Now, I kind of think it's cool how much of an emotional response these books got out of me, but it also brings up another point: every reader has different levels of what they can handle.

A lot of really intense books that you probably think are fluff would have terrified me if I would've read them even in middle school. I wasn't ready to read those kinds of books until now or a few years ago. But that's OK, because everyone is different and everyone reads differently and takes things in differently. Evidently I get taken in very easily by books and their fictional worlds, so they have, and have had throughout the years, a much stronger effect on me than other people.

Not every 13-year-old (or any age) is going to be able to handle all the same books that every other 13-year-old can handle. That's kind of why I think rating books is a weird idea. People need to "rate" books according to their own personal needs, and not make a general statement that everyone should follow.

What do you think? What books creeped you out when you were young?

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Living Inside Your Head Sometimes Is Harmful to Your Health

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OK, so my imagination already gives me ENOUGH troubles. But somehow it is the root of the cause of another overactiveimaginationitis-related disease. Namely, zoningoutitis. It is also known as "Staring Blankly Into Space" or "Checking Out Of The Normal, Alive World To A More Interesting World Inside The Head". Yeah, there are wikipedia articles on those guys, that's how legitimate they are (ha!).

Anyway, it's not MY fault my brain is so interesting. I mean, the things it thinks up...

For instance, I could be innocently washing off my bike with Automotive Cleaner and then all of a sudden I am launched into a world where I am an automotive cleaner entrepreneur, and my automotive cleaner has the motto/instruction "For Bikes and Stuff". Then, in this world in my brain, someone uses the cleaner for "and Stuff", it ends badly, and suddenly I am being sued and while being interviewed about this tragedy by the press I tell them that I just used that phrase because I thought it was funny and-

So yeah, I COULD be thinking something as crazy as that (heheh) until my brother could hypothetically spray me with the hose.

Or I could be thinking about all my cool blog readers and my cool blog ideas that are currently simmering, and then I wake up to find myself with a teaspoon of baking soda in my fingers and realizing I've forgotten I'm doubling the recipe for banana chocolate chip muffins AGAIN. I mean, hypothetically, this could be one of my zoningoutitis episodes. Hypothetically. Ahem.

So, with no further ado, THINGS TO LOOK FOR WHEN CONSIDERING YOU COULD POSSIBLY HAVE ZONINGOUTITIS. (Oh, and for those of you who have trouble reading smushedtogetherwords, that's zoning-out-itis).

PEOPLE  WAVING A LOT MORE

There is a strange fad sweeping the nation! It's not the weirdness of planking (seriously what the heck is with that?) but an even stranger trend: people are constantly waving their hands in front of your face! This is also usually accompanied by loud, "Hello?? HELLO!?? Um, [Your Name]!?!?!??"

But are you mistaken? Are you sure this isn't just a case of you ZONING OUT, and supposed fad-follower is just trying to get your attention? Examine these situations closely, people!

AN INCREASE IN BAD DRIVING

The number of times lately that you have almost been run over by a car, or a bike, or a bus, or really any moving vehicle, is getting to be too many to count! But, hey, look closer. Was it really the DRIVER of said bike/car/bus/cat? Or maybe you were thinking about how the entire world could be a hologram hiding another planet (kind of like The Matrix) and you stepped of the curb a little too soon.

PEOPLE MUMBLE FREQUENTLY

You have to say "What?" after pretty much every other sentence anyone says to you. You think that people really need to stop mumbling and SPEAK UP. But, wait. Are you REALLY paying attention to what people are saying? Or are you thinking of that bike rack you saw in Calgary that was loop-de-loop shaped, and how it would be really cool if you had a unicycle-riding lemur so it could ride the loops on the rack on its unicycle?

YOU END UP IN STRANGE PLACES A LOT MORE

You are suddenly staring at a teaspoon of baking soda that you don't remember filling up. You find yourself at the fridge, ready to pour yourself a nice cold glass of milk and- wait, why are you holding a plate!? Yeah, if you find yourself standing on a sidewalk somewhere, blinking and then going "How in the world did I get here?" then this is probably how it went:

8 AM LOCATION OF YOU: At home.
8:30AM-1:45 PM: LOCATION OF YOU: In your head.
2:00PM: LOCATION OF YOU: WHOA WHERE AM I!?!?

So, if you notice ANY of these things in your life, I am sorry to inform you but...

You are a sufferer of zoningoutitis. It's okay. We're all in this together. If you feel the need, go see your doctor for extra information and support. But I believe that the best thing for you to do is to reach out to the zoningoutitis sufferer community. We are here for you. We are all friends here, and we can help each other get through this. I promise.

*Disclaimer: I AM NOT A DOCTOR IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM. aka I am not qualified to make diagnoses.
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Note: all  very hypothetical (ahem) imaginings are courtesy of my brain, except for the lemur cyclist one which is courtesy of my brother.

Why Having An Overactive Imagination Is Kind of A Problem

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There are things to be said about having an imagination that constantly overuses and outdoes itself. Yeah, sure, there are good things like being able to write amazing crazy stories and think up crazy answers to the questions kids might ask you about life just to spice things up, or you come up with a crazy explanation for the cottony fluff floating from the sky with your brother (it's from trolls that eat snow and spit out fluff after they boil it in a magic pot, or something like that).

But there are also problems with living with an overactive imagination when you want to, you know, LIVE A NORMAL LIFE. Here are some problems I've encountered:

YOU BELIEVE CRAZY STORIES

Like, when your French teacher tells you that there's a subway in the basement of your school, you kind of believe her because you can actually imagine a subway rumbling through the basement of your school. Or you believe things your dad tells you when trying to trick you, and then you are destined to be endlessly made fun of by your brother and dad.

YOU MAKE UP CHARACTERIZATIONS FOR EVERYTHING

Apparently, characterizing everything from individual numbers, to individual letters, to your contact lenses... (WHAT NO I DON'T DO THIS... *ahem*) is not the kind of thing a normal person does. But come on, you can't argue that the number nine is pompous, right?

HYPERVENTILATING WHILE BABYSITTING

I was sitting drinking my orange juice while watching the little one-year-old I was babysitting stab at his oatmeal, and take forever to snag ONE OAT on his spoon and then proceed to suck it off his spoon. (If he kept at it like this, it was going to take forever until his oatmeal was gone). It was all good until he started coughing. *IMAGINATION TAKEOVER*: "OH NO WHAT IF HE STARTS CHOKING AND I CAN'T DO CPR AND I HAVE TO CALL 911 AND THEN HE HAS TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL HIS PARENTS WILL KILL ME AND FIRE ME AND I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO BABYSIT AGAIN *deep breath*... oh. He's laughing. Um. Yeah."

CREEPY STORIES COME ALIVE WHILE HOME ALONE AT NIGHT

House: Creak.
Me: whatwasthat.
House: CREAK!
Me: It's a robber, it MUST be a robber. He's going to come in the house and point a gun at my face, and I will have to lunge for the phone while kicking him in the face no wait I can't do that I've never taken any martial arts he'll probably kill me instead WHY ARE ALL THE LIGHTS OFF!?!? The robber's here and he's cut the power!! AUGH!!
House: MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

No, I don't need to see a therapist. Why?

How does your imagination react to things in your life?? Seriously, I can't be the only one who thinks like this.